I saw this in The Classic FM Pocket Book of Music, which I ran across at Dr. Kavanaugh’s house; this is the entry on the French horn:
A member of the brass family, if this instrument was uncoiled it would not only stretch for more than three metres, it would also give you something to do on a Sunday afternoon. Best not attempted during the quiet bit in a concert, though. Great composers for the horn include Mozart and Richard Strauss.
And just to be fair, here’s what they have to say about mine own instrument, the bassoon:
The bassoon is the lowest woodwind instrument of the orchestra. It looks something like a didgeridoo wearing too much jewellery, but with an espresso frother coming out of the side. In fact, just like espresso, it too comes in single and double varieties.